Slippers of Doom?

So, two days later, and I am still feeling the effects of the slippers’ attempt on my life.

It was amusing to me, the response I got when I told people that it was the slippers. Granted, the look on my mother’s face when she heard my whole “not a full moon” comment was completely priceless, but I was thinking more of the reaction to the slippers bit.

A friend was like, “and that is why I say slippers = death.”

I had to explain, first, that slippers or something on the feet is necessary because the basement where I spend my days chained to my computer my time has very little carpet. It also happens to be winter. It is freezing without something on the feet, thus the need for slippers or socks.

So then I was forced to explain my issues with socks. I don’t like those ankle socks because they feel weird and like my socks are constantly falling down. I also don’t like the other ones because they get tight around my ankles and bug me. You will never, ever catch me in socks that go to my knees or separate my toes, either. I’m a very picky person, and those socks feel… confining. Like turtlenecks. Can’t do them, either.

So then I was told to get some Crocs instead. I explained my aversion to plastic shoes (especially with holes in them) and though both the twins tried to persuade me that it was worth trying, plastic shoes to me are as spandex is to Clayton, the not-so-super superhero. No matter how comfortable those things are supposed to be, they’re still made of plastic, and it’s wrong when I can feel plastic on my feet.


Back to the slippers, though. Immediately after explaining how I ended up falling down part of the stairs while on the phone with my grandmother, she said, “that’s why you’re not supposed to wear slippers when you’re running around.”

I was not running, but okay. I don’t usually have problems with slippers or stairs, but I’m not going to deny that the slippers did, in fact, try to kill me.

It still hurts, I’m still bruised, and I keep finding new places that got hit or muscles that got pulled.

Still, for the record, I have slipper socks on today.

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