Author’s Note: I ended up taking an impromptu break from writing and posting over the last few days.

I do have, though, put together a piece on Mackenna’s costume to go along with this section, a start of whole series of things I’m calling “From a Character’s Closet.”

“I have the costumes for you to try on.”

“Give me a second, will you?” Carson said, grabbing his shirt and wincing. He hadn’t heard Mackenna coming, and he was only half-dressed. He’d been hoping to put this off for a bit longer by being dressed before she came to get him, but he’d taken too long getting up—what was it with her? Shouldn’t she be less of a morning person after staying up all the time and having a hangover? He didn’t want to deal with this right now.

“Okay, I bring you clothes, and you’re really going to finish dressing before you turn to face me? What is wrong with this picture?”

“Whatever was bothering you before you came in the room,” he told her, shaking his head. “I thought the costume thing was for the parade, and I never said I was doing it all day. You’re nuts. That’s not happening. Even if I have a hard time saying no to you, it’s just not happening.”

“How did you know something was bothering me?”

“The sound of your voice when you came in.” He pulled the shirt over his head and turned to face her. The rest of his explanation went right out of his head. He couldn’t think. He could only stare. He’d always known that Mackenna was a woman—other than that first moment when she was under the car—and it wasn’t like she was hideous or deformed or anything like that—but her dress seemed to take all the things that made her a woman and emphasize them, hugging her waist and pushing up her chest. That was the corset part of it, he supposed, but hell. He didn’t—he couldn’t—all those lines that he wasn’t supposed to cross and all those thoughts that he wasn’t supposed to have about her, they all hit him at once.

He wanted her. He’d never wanted any woman as much as he did her, not even his first crush or his first girlfriend, not when he’d had all those stupid teenage hormones. He couldn’t do this, though.

He had to find a way back to being unaware of how good she looked and the way he’d like to touch her. He had to. Her friendship and support through this whole crisis with his memories resurfacing meant too much to him to let her go. He couldn’t afford to ruin this.

“Carson? You okay? You zoning out on me again?”

“I… Yeah, I guess I did. Sorry.”

She forced a smile. “It’s all right. I’m not expecting you to control it or anything like that. Those memories come when they want to, not when we want them to. Mostly, I think, because we don’t want them to come.”

“Exactly,” he said, feeling a bit sick to his stomach for a different reason this time.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You look… off.”

“I feel a little… strange,” he admitted, sitting down on the bed and trying to sort out his emotions. He had to find a way to go back to when he wasn’t as aware of every part of her as he was right now. “Um… Just leave the clothes. I’ll deal with them in a bit.”

“I don’t think I should go,” she told him, sitting down next to him. He tried not to look at her. That would only start him thinking again, and he didn’t think it was good to have her next to him. Not here. Not now. “What’s wrong?”

“What’s bothering you?”

“Oh, just… the past. Got started thinking about my aunt and that old apartment and…” She let her head rest against her shoulder. “You want to know why I really get you? Why it’s so easy to understand the not knowing?”

“Honestly? Probably not,” he said, feeling like a heel. He didn’t want to say no, but he’d be lying if he said he wanted all the details. “I don’t want to think about you being hurt and there being nothing I can do about it because it happened years ago.”

She smiled, wrapping her arm around his waist. “That is why I like having you around. No false pity, no lies, just understanding.”

“Yeah, same here.” He had to get her off of him, though, and he hated himself for it. He’d put on the costume if that was what it took. If he did that, said he wanted to change, she’d go, and that was what he needed. “I like your outfit.”

What the hell was that? That wasn’t what he meant to say.

She laughed. “Oh, I cheat a bit—this is more steampunk than authentic run attire, but I have to balance what I wear with the whole fixing cars aspect of it. No Gibson girl look for me. I couldn’t do it. I’ve got another that’s got a detachable skirt that I use on the run itself just in case something happens. This one is nice, though. I like the long coat.”

“Coat is nice,” he said, but he’d been staring at the corset part, and he didn’t think he’d even noticed the coat. So much for honesty. “Um… If I’m going to try on the clothes, you’re going to need to move.”

“Okay. Meet us upstairs when you’re done.”

“I will.”

Author’s Note: Fair warning… Don’t drink a mixed drink at the Legion in question. It’s always stronger than you expect. Of course, if you don’t drink beer, you don’t have much choice, but I’d say keep it to one rum and Coke and ask for extra Coke. Just trust me on that one. 😛

“Carrie’ll make sure we get to the hotel okay. Don’t worry about us. We’re not driving back tonight,” Larry said, and Carson gave him a look. While his sister-in-law hadn’t had as much as either of the others—Mackenna couldn’t seem to resist a drinking contest, which was not a good thing—and was more or less clear-headed, he didn’t like the idea of sending them off on their own. Then again, he wasn’t sure he could leave Mackenna on her own for more than a few minutes, as tipsy as she was. Even Carson had drank more than his usual, not comfortable discussing what he’d learned with his brothers, and he knew it was a mistake, but he didn’t know how else to keep himself calm just then.

“He’s going to worry no matter what,” Mackenna said, leaning against him. “He does that. Carson worries. A lot.”

He looked at her. “You might have a problem, you know.”

She shook her head. “Not a drunk. I swear. It’s only Sundays at the Legion, and I’m not like this most of the time. I promise. Not an alcoholic. Tried hard not to be. It’s just that it all hits at once, and I sound like a drunk. I’m sorry.”

He put an arm around her waist to keep her upright. “You have the keys to the Woodsman? Mac went back with Natalie and Jim, I think.”

“Yes. I have keys. I think I’ll sleep in Shadow, though. That way you don’t have to worry about driving. See? Perfect solution.”

He rolled his eyes. “No, it’s not, but we’ll make sure you stop before it hits you next time.”

“Are you still mad that I invited everyone?”

“No, I’m not mad.” He didn’t know that he could stay mad at her. He hadn’t wanted to try or anything, but so far anything she’d done that had upset him had passed, the anger or frustration or horror—that was when they discussed theories about what happened to his father—that all seemed to fade almost as fast as it came.

“Good.” Mackenna tried to straighten herself up, didn’t quite manage it, and let out a sigh. “So… In the morning there’s a brunch, and I don’t know if the tickets are all sold out or not, but the cafe has good food, too. You can try that or eat before you leave Wilmar. If you find us before ten, you can ride along for the lake tour, after which we get root beer floats. It’s a tradition.”

“Sounds good,” Larry said, smiling. Carrie gave him a look. “Come on. It’s not every day you get to ride around in antique car and get a bonus root beer float. Don’t be a spoilsport.”

“I’m going to get Carson to dress up in costume for the parade. You have to stick around for that, at least. Mac would say it was imposing, but Natalie did tell me to tell you she had room for all of you. So there’s that if you’re worried about money for the motel.”

“I don’t remember that,” Carson said, frowning. “Are you sure she said that? You didn’t just come up with that after all that drinking because they didn’t say they had that many spare rooms.”

“No, but they have a couch or two and people can share rooms. We talked about it in the bathroom, if you must know.”

“They did,” Carrie said. She let out a breath. “I’m surprised that you didn’t argue with her about the costume thing.”

“Oh, I basically lost that battle last week, but there’s still no guarantee that what she brought is going to fit me. I might not be in costume.”

“You’re really getting into all of this, aren’t you?” Nick asked, and Carson shrugged. He didn’t know how much of it he was into, but he did know that he couldn’t seem to argue with Mackenna, and she was into this stuff. That meant that it was going to be important to him, too, as long as he was spending time with her.

“Carson is involved, after all. He owns the car,” Mackenna said, and then she frowned. He watched her, hoping she wasn’t about to puke on him. “Well, maybe.”

“Yeah, if Dad got it through some kind of criminal activity, I’m not sure Carson can keep it, but we’ll see about that when we know all the facts.”

“If it was a crime that happened that long ago, I’m not sure they can do anything about the funds, but we’ll have to see. Who knows?”

“Lynda might.”

“Shut up, Nick. I’m not calling my ex-wife.”

“We should find Larry a girlfriend, right?”

“Come on, Mackenna. Let’s get you back to Jim and Natalie’s before you start a fight.”

Author’s Note: Another cameo by my grandpa, and the rest of the boys get caught up to speed. 🙂

“So… What else have you come up with?”

“I already told you everything,” Carson said, and Mackenna had to nod. He’d given them more detail on some of the stuff he’d gotten back than he’d given her, and she didn’t think that there was any more to tell—she was sure he’d have told her if there was. “I have. It’s not a lot.”

“It’s still a whole lot more than you had when you were in high school. Back then, all you had was some image of Dad in the barn, dead.”

Carson nodded, reaching for his beer. “I know. Now I know that he was around before then, a couple of times at least. I don’t know what he was after. Part of it sounded like he was trying to find a way to come back to us, and I don’t know if he picked me because I was the youngest and he thought I’d be easier to convince or if he was afraid to face any of the ones that actually knew him or what.”

Larry shrugged. “It’s hard to say. I probably remember Dad best of any of us, but I was only five when he took off, so that’s not much. If you listened to Mom’s stories—and I stopped after a while because they were all the same and I couldn’t understand why a man that supposedly loved us so much could walk away like he did—”

“You know someone told me once he was disappointed that he didn’t get a girl?”

“That’s a stupid thing to say.” Mackenna shook her head. “Not only does it not matter if the kid’s a boy or a girl, if you want them, you get one and they’re healthy, that’s all that should matter. Besides, all of you seem to like women, so he’d have gotten three daughters eventually.”

“Or he’d just adopt random strangers like we did,” Carson said, smiling at her, and she nodded. Someone kicked him under the table, and she winced as she got caught in the crossfire.

“Who did that?”

“Did what?”

She rolled her eyes. “I’ll find out, and I’ll make them pay for it, I swear.”

Carson shook his head, laughing, and both of his brothers tried to look innocent and failed. Carrie gave a long-suffering sigh. She didn’t seem to enjoy the boys’ antics much, which made Mackenna wonder why she’d wanted to marry Nick. From what she’d seen, it was always like this around the boys, and when a person married someone, they took on their family, too, no matter how estranged they might be.

“Your grandfather was looking for you.”

Mackenna forced a smile as she looked back at Bob. “I’m sure. I might even be in a lot of trouble. I took off on a joyride, and I think I missed the meet-n-greet. We kind of had… other things to deal with. Are you all matched up and settled? Everything good with your tow drivers?”

Bob nodded. “We’re good.”

“This is Carson’s family. His brothers Larry and Nick and his sister-in-law Carrie. This is Bob. He’s a part of the car club Mac and I belong to, and he’s been on this run ever since it started. His father owned a Maxwell dealership, so we asked him about the car that Carson found.”

“Quite a find,” Bob said, shaking hands with Larry and Nick. “Good car.”

“Really? Seemed like a wreck.”

Mackenna reached over and hit Nick, who grimaced, rubbing his arm. Carrie shook her head. “You don’t have to act like one of the guys, you know.”

“This is how I always am. You could ask Bob if you don’t believe me.”

Bob shook his head, not wanting to get involved. He excused himself and went over to join his group—current and former tow drivers that he and Mary spent their time with when they were in town—and Mackenna thought maybe his daughter and one or more of the granddaughters might be with them, too. If she got a chance, she’d say hello.

“Do you need to go find Mac, then? I suppose you’d better put Shadow in for the night.”

Mackenna nodded. “I do need to do that, though if Mac’s not here, he’s probably taking care of that right now. Don’t want to do it too late or no one would be able to see her. I don’t think those kerosene lamps of hers have been used since she was new.”

“Is that why Nate said his parents were trying to win the battle to get him to go on the candlelight run the other night?”

She nodded. “Yeah. I’ve always been a bit curious, but Mac and Grandma thought it was too dangerous. The lights are hard to see—other cars might miss them and they don’t give enough illumination for the antique drivers—so it can be somewhat risky if people aren’t being careful. I still think it would be fun to try sometime, just once in my life.”

“Well, if you get Phantom going, you can take her.”

“You mean we’ll take her.”

“Right.”

Author’s Note: So… I didn’t leave it well enough alone and let them have a nice, fun drive. That’s just not the way it works in a mystery, right?

“So, you tried driving one of these babies yet?” Larry asked, leaning over the seat. He’d called shotgun, which was a battle no one ever won with him, even though Carson wanted to think that Mackenna would have kicked him out of the front in a second if she wasn’t trying to be polite. He’d kind of figured on being up next to her when she was driving, unless Mac was there, but somehow he’d ended up supplanted and stuck in back with Nick and Carrie.

There was enough room for three, possibly for more, but the trouble with being with Nick and Carrie was that the world only existed for the two of them. The lovebirds were having a lark, and Carson swore they were pretending this was some sort of carriage ride the way they kept kissing.

He shook his head. “No. I don’t want to wreck an heirloom. Mackenna keeps insisting when she’s done fixing the one I found that I have to drive it, but I think it’s better if I don’t. I can just see myself wrecking it and undoing all the work she put into it, and she’d never forgive me for that.”

“That true?” Larry turned to Mackenna. “Could you forgive him if he did that, or would it all be over if he did?”

“Depends on what he did and why he did it. If he swerved to avoid an animal in the road and ended up in a ditch, then I wouldn’t be quite as mad because I’d have to consider the reason. If he was just being stupid and totaled it, then I might not be as forgiving.”

“Thing you should know about dear baby brother Carson is that he’s a terrible klutz. He’s going to wreck something. That’s what he does. Should have seen him when he was… Oh, I forget how old he was, but he had this toy car—you know, one of those neat old ones before the days of battery-powered cars for kids, the kind that had pedals and stuff—and he didn’t keep that thing more than a day before he managed to crash it into something on the farm. He was so upset about it he didn’t leave his room for about a week.”

“That is not true. I never had a little car like that. You’re just—Oh, hell.”

“Carson?” Nick sat up and leaned around Carrie, putting a hand on Carson’s arm. “Hey—you’re not going to puke, are you? You look kind of… off. What is it?”

The car stopped, and Carson opened the door, stumbling down to the ground, leaning over and trying not to lose his stomach. He put a hand on his side, wincing as he did.

“I think we should take you someplace cool. I’m not sure if you were overcome by the heat or not, but I’ve never seen carsickness come on so fast before,” Carrie said, and he jerked away when he realized she was close to him.

Mackenna caught him. “Easy. Take a minute and breathe. This is just another part of the puzzle, remember? You have it, so tell us what it is.”

“I don’t—I never had one of those cars, but if I was babbling about a car and unable to function for at least a week, I have a feeling that I know why,” he said, looking at her, and she nodded. “It explains this, too.”

He lifted his shirt and showed her the scar on his side. She winced, her fingers tracing the mark without thinking about it. “I don’t think that’s not from any kind of wreck in a toy car.”

“Yeah. I don’t know why I would have accepted that story—I knew it was wrong the minute that Larry said it—but I always assumed the scar was nothing, like I told you—I didn’t have any without an explanation.”

“I know.” She put a hand on his face. “All right, you know that something made you forget, and whatever that was, it was a combination of what you saw and what happened to you. You were hurt. That’s not much of a surprise, not when you consider what happened to your father.”

He nodded. “Yeah. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ruin the drive. Everyone was having fun, and it’s not like I got much of anything from it this time. It’s not like the model car or anything.”

She gave his cheek a pat. “It’s still something. You are putting it all back together. Soon enough, you’ll have your answers.”

“Wait, what? Are you telling us that Carson—he got more memories back?” Larry looked from Mackenna to Carson, shaking his head. “Why didn’t you tell us? If you found out more, then why would you—You didn’t trust us?”

Carson lowered his head. “At best, you have always acted like I was fragile and crazy. At worst, since I couldn’t remember when Dad died for sure—I’ve narrowed it down since then to when I was eight, shortly after school started that year, which fits in with the story you mentioned, but I didn’t… I also don’t know who had any other part in it. I haven’t gotten anything back from when Dad died specifically. I just got back a few things from before, and if I told you any of the things that we discussed about it, you’d just… It would only upset all of you.”

Nick frowned. “You mean, you think that Dad gave you that mark on your side?”

“Well, one of the best theories we have about what happened—the reason I couldn’t remember it—was that I did it,” Carson said, feeling Mackenna wrap her arms around him. He leaned into her, welcoming the slight smell of grease that he now associated with her and all she was. He needed her. “If he did… the reasons why… It’s not something I like thinking, and I’m still hoping we’re wrong, but why else would I have forgotten and Grandpa cover it up like that?”

Larry winced. “You’ve got a point. He would only have done that for someone in the family. He would definitely have done it for you.”

“Maybe now’s a good time to go over to that Legion of yours and have some drinks.”

Author’s Note: It’s always so awkward trying to salvage things after a bad conversation.

“We don’t have anything going until the meeting with the tow drivers,” Mackenna said, not sure how to talk to him at this point. She knew they’d discussed adopting each other, they’d even discussed marriage in a joking sort of way, but they’d never made a real promise about any kind of… forever, and even if they had, promises could be empty, with less meaning than the words used to make them. Her aunt had given her plenty of them over the years. It’s okay, Mac. We’ll be all right. Just a few more months at this place, and we’ll be out on our own in a real apartment. No more of the ones without walls, I promise. No, Mac, I fixed the lock, I swear, and I never gave out any keys. You must be imagining things again. You know how you get. None of that ever happened.

Mackenna wrapped the duster around her. She shouldn’t need it in this heat, but that voice, those memories, always gave her a chill. “The repairs on Shadow seem to have done the trick. I’m not going to be working on anything else today.”

Carson nodded, putting his hands in his pockets. “That’s good, right?”

She shrugged. “It is, and it isn’t.”

“How much do you think your grandfather hates me?”

She frowned. “I’m telling you—Mac doesn’t hate you. He’s a bit gruff with everyone, and I know he’s been that way with you, but that doesn’t mean that he hates you.”

“I don’t know. I think I keep making him mad, and that’s going to be kind of awkward. Or very awkward. Well, if I ask what I was thinking of asking, yeah, it’ll be very awkward. I’m sorry, it’s just… You’d mentioned it before, and I think I have to, since I don’t have the money to keep my apartment, and I have to break the lease… so… I was going to… um…”

“Is this about staying with us for longer?”

“Mac won’t like that, but… yeah. I know I didn’t—I’m not necessarily going to leave the instant you fix the car. I didn’t mean to make it sound like that. We’re friends now. Family, even, sort of, and I’m not in much of a position to leave, but I still think you… deserve the car, that’s all.”

She found herself smiling, her stomach feeling a little off, and she was about to blame that on the heat when she found herself up in the air. She shoved against the arms around her waist, trying to get down. “Here she is, our favorite lady mechanic.”

“Larry, you idiot, let go of her,” Carson said, shaking his head as he moved to separate his brother from her. She hadn’t even heard someone coming up behind her, and she should have. She took a deep breath, trying to calm down now that she was on the ground again.

“You look the part, too. Very authentic,” Nick said, smiling as he pushed another woman forward. “This is my wife, Carrie. Carrie, this is Mackenna. She’s ‘not’ Carson’s girlfriend.”

“Do not even start.” Carson rolled his eyes. “I can’t believe you invited them. I blame you.”

Mackenna shrugged. “I thought they’d get a kick out of seeing the parade and taking turns riding in the Maxwell, too. I didn’t know they’d all come today, though. They missed the main part since that run’s already over, but they can join us for the dinner meet-n-greet later, and in the meantime… We should just take a drive.”

“I’m not sure they’d want that after being in the car for at least five hours.”

“This is different, and we won’t be able to go once the sun sets, so…” She shrugged, looking at each of the others in turn. “Well, if you want to go for a short drive in the antique, we need to go now. Otherwise… We tend to spend the afternoon in the Legion until the meeting with the tow drivers, and then we eat and end up at the Legion. We’re rather boring, all things considered.”

“Hardly,” Carrie said, giving Carson a pointed look. He shook his head, and Mackenna decided that she was not going to let this turn into another one of those conversations. They had better things to do with their time.

“All right. Which of you two very manly men is going to get the engine started? Remember, it is a crank, so there’s work involved.”

“Me,” Larry said, and Carson snorted. His brother pushed him, and he just kept on laughing. Mackenna smiled. Nick tried to beat him to the car, and Carrie just sighed.

“Boys.”

“Oh, come on. They’re fun. Otherwise you would never have married Nick,” Mackenna said, getting a smile from Carson. Carrie frowned. Mackenna moved over to the car. “Easy now. You have to push it in and hold it, then turn. If you turn it the wrong way or lose your grip, it’ll kick, and that can break your arm. Careful.”

“I think you better show them how it’s done,” Carson told her, and she grinned. She would enjoy putting his brothers in their place. Again. This afternoon would be a lot of fun.

Author’s Note: I like puzzles. Puzzles can be fun. Can’t say the same about assumptions.

“Puzzle therapy?”

“Don’t knock it ’til you’ve tried it. We made a lot of progress last night, and not just on that puzzle,” Mackenna said, looking down at their near finished masterpiece with a smile. Carson was still asleep against the couch, adorable despite his awkward position. She’d used him as a pillow again, and she knew she had to break that habit quick or she’d never be able to sleep again. She needed to be able to sleep on her own. Carson wouldn’t always be there—he’d said as much already.

She shook that off, refusing to dwell on it. She wouldn’t let that bother her. Either she’d find a way to sleep on her own again—or she’d find a way to keep Carson around. It wasn’t like he didn’t need a place to live now that he didn’t have a job and couldn’t afford an apartment.

Not that Mac would be thrilled with the idea, but she wanted Carson around, and he wouldn’t stay forever anyway.

Well…

Nate frowned. “You okay over there?”

She nodded. “Yeah, just thinking about what I have to do today and trying to make plans. I don’t know if I can get what I need to do to Shadow’s engine done before the tour at eleven-thirty, and I don’t know if I can dress up with so much to be done to the car. I’ve been hoping to get Carson into costume, but I don’t think I can talk him into it unless I do it, but between being late yesterday and all that needs to be done before this one… I doubt I can.”

“You know a lot of people only dress up for the parade and maybe the run, most don’t do all the pretours.”

“I know, but I’m stubborn that way. If I wasn’t going to be a mess by the time I was done with Shadow’s engine, I’d go in costume.”

“It would be interesting to see you work on the car in a dress.”

“Thanks, Carson.”

“You’re welcome. I was trying to help,” he said, getting up and rubbing the back of his neck. “I’ll even wear the lightning bolts to cheer you on, give you a speed boost.”

She laughed. “Nice. I appreciate it.”

“I knew you would.”

Nate looked at each of them in turn, and Carson smiled as he lifted up his pant leg to show off yesterday’s handle bar mustaches. “I collect socks. I’m weird that way. I’ve got a special pair for the parade—bow ties. Today, though, I’m going with the lightning bolts.”

“Okay.”

Mackenna grinned. “We’re going to start getting me weird ones. After a couple weeks with Carson, I’ve come to see that plain white socks just don’t cut it anymore.”

“Ha. You have come to the dark side after all.”

“Well, I’d blame it on the cookies, but you never offered me any of those. Just some really old frozen waffles.”

He shrugged. “I will never be a cook, Ms. Finnan haddie.”

She stuck her tongue out at him. “Go shower before I get in there and take all the hot water.”

He laughed, disappearing into the bedroom they’d given him, and Nate shook his head. Mackenna shrugged. “What? We have a lot of fun together. It isn’t all flashbacks and car stuff and theories about his dad’s death. We just… get along. It’s nice.”

“I didn’t say it wasn’t, but maybe we should see about arranging a different kind of ceremony for you this Saturday—Ow.”

“You deserved that and more,” she said, tempted to hit him again. “We agreed that we’re adopting each other as brother and sister. So I get him and his two overprotective brothers—speaking of which, I am so calling them—and he gets me and Mac. It’s not an even trade, but I like the boys. They’re fun. I suppose I need to meet Nick’s wife. He certainly told me enough about her. That is one devoted husband there.”

“Uh huh.”

She hit Nate again, rolling her eyes as she went back to her own room to change.

Author’s Note: It was Mackenna’s turn to share a bit. 🙂

“Any better now?”

“I think your grandfather hates me.”

“Oh, please,” Mackenna said, not sure where Carson had gotten that idea. Sure, they’d bailed on dinner with Jim and Natalie, but they would be eating with them another night. That always seemed to happen when they were in town for the run. She bet he hadn’t done anything about the card and gift certificate that they always got them as a thank you, but that didn’t mean that mac had any reason to be upset with Carson. “Mac’s a bit gruff with everyone, including me. He used to blame it on his Scottish ancestry, but we all know that not every Scot is like that, so he couldn’t keep using it as an excuse.”

“It’s not just that. He’s been giving me the evil eye since that car club dinner, and I just seem to make it worse.”

She thought she knew exactly how Carson could fix that, but she didn’t want to get into it just now. That was crossing lines she didn’t want to cross. They had the house to themselves, with plenty of things to amuse themselves with, but she had a feeling it would always go back to the same topic, at least until he got his memories back.

“I think we need this,” she said, rising to grab the puzzle box off the shelf behind him. He frowned at her as she brought it back to the table. “I told you why I like working on cars. It’s too dark now, but I need something to keep my hands busy, and you could use something, too.”

“I’m surprised you’re not trying to make me play dress up.”

She laughed, opening the box and setting the lid aside. “I did want to get you into costume, but since that would stress you out and your stomach is already iffy, I thought we’d save it for after we’d talked things out a bit. You’re worried about how your father had the money to buy the car, aren’t you?”

Carson nodded, taking a handful of pieces and sorting out the ones with the edge on them. “We weren’t rich. Ever. It wasn’t just about my mother’s depression. The farm had stopped making much of any money years before, and Dad was not exactly an entrepreneur. We lived at the farm before he left because they couldn’t afford a place of their own.”

“Could be an innocent reason for that. Could be he inherited money after he left.”

“From who? My great-grandparents on his side were already dead. He was an only child. We never knew any family on his side, just on Mom’s.”

“Maybe that’s the problem. Maybe it was someone you never met, someone who didn’t approve of your father’s marriage and cut him off. The way he got back in their good graces was to deny all of you. Not honorable, but not all that surprising, either.”

“Just unlikely.” Carson set a few pieces on the table and started organizing them. “What if he was a criminal? That fits with the handgun part. He could have gone on some kind of spree, could have even been… in prison. Actually, that fits with part of what he told me—that he had a good reason for staying away. Why not that?”

“Except if he was in prison, how did everyone lose track of him for the eight years between your birth and his return?”

Carson shook his head. “I don’t know. I don’t have an answer for everything. All we have is a bunch of theories.”

“Yeah. I’m good at theories. Too good.”

He gave her a look, and she sighed, scooting closer to him before letting her head rest on his shoulder. “My aunt was a mess, you know. Between her hypochondria and the rest of her issues, she was pretty much incapable of holding down a job. We got stuck with her parents on and off for a while, and they didn’t want kids around. They’d raised theirs, and they were done. I’m not even so sure they wanted her in the first place. Living with them was… unbearable. So many rules, so many ways to screw up, and I did just about every day.”

“Like the alcohol thing?”

“Oh, yeah. He had his under lock and key, thought he was so righteous because he only ever had one drink a week—on Sundays with dinner. I don’t think I would even have cared so much about it if he didn’t accuse me of trying to get in there every time I was in the kitchen. I got so sick of being accused of something I didn’t do that I did it. I emptied every bottle he had and got sick in the process, but he kept buying his wine, and I kept on drinking a bit at a time just to piss him off.”

Carson winced. “Were you there for a long time?”

“No. To give my aunt what little credit she’s due, she did try and make it on her own. It’s just when she did, she couldn’t afford much. An apartment in the crappiest part of town, you know the type. The walls were so thin you could hear everything. I couldn’t sleep for wondering if I was going to be next. The next to overdose, the next to be knocked around or raped or killed. All kinds of things went on in those apartment buildings, and I could hear them all, could imagine being a part of them… Sometimes I couldn’t tell if I was still just imagining things or if some of them had happened. I didn’t sleep, and I learned too much about the ugly side of life. It doesn’t even need to touch you to mess with you. You know what could have been, and there’s not much keeping you from it, just you holding your breath behind the closet door and maybe even praying that the stranger who wandered into the apartment while your aunt is gone won’t realize you’re there.”

She felt Carson’s arm go around her waist. “You know that you now have two older brothers that would hold onto anyone who tried and let you kick their ass for thinking about doing anything to you. Larry and Nick will help protect you from all the bad that’s out there.”

“Oh? Why just them? Why don’t I have three brothers to protect me?”

He laughed. “Because they always had to rescue me from the bullies. I’d be right there in trouble with you.”

“Ah. I see. That works, too.”

“It had better. That’s the best I can do.”

“Quit selling yourself short. This is a lot more than you think.”