The Part of Eccentric Writer Will Be Played Unsuccessfully by Me

I woke up this morning in dread of my upcoming book signing. I had a headache, and I was slow moving and prone to many bouts of panic over the morning alone.

I didn’t know what to wear. I had a hard time talking myself into a shower.

Eventually, I found a dress I’d worn before for memorial and renaissance fair, and I tried it on to be sure it still fit. It did, so I had a dress that looked awesome, if a bit over the top. (A lot over the top.)

I did the showering and even ironed the dress, as it had gotten very wrinkled. Maxwell helped so very much by jumping into my dress while I was ironing it. That gave me a bit of a panic as I felt sure that he was going to rip it. I got it on, and I wandered about, hours before the signing. I even attempted to fix the windshield wiper problem with my car (one is too long, it’s odd) and put on a new Grumpy Cat decal, all in the dress.

I even put on a flower headdress, as I was without any other idea what to do with my hair.

I told my nephew that I was embracing the role of eccentric author.

I even took along Bill, my bag that is shaped like a buffalo, to complete the look.

Alas, things went rather badly at the signing. At first the room Mom booked was still in use until after the scheduled time and they didn’t clean it afterward. We organized things in the room, got all set up, with a few disagreements about certain pictures (I do not photograph well) and we waited.

People passed, lots of them, as we were in the walkway, but no one came in.

No one came at all until the other part of Kabobbles, the cover artist, showed.

So I did not sign any books. I did not sell any books.

I did tell a man outside the place who asked if I’d gotten married that I was there to sign books and showed the proofs to him, but that was it.

I drove home uncertain what part might have fallen off my car earlier, took off the dress, and did my worthy best not to curl up in a ball and cry.

We ended up getting supplies for Skip and Go Nakeds, and so ends my day of being an eccentric writer. I suppose I have that last part down, you know what I mean, right?

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